The Confession of Pain: Creating the Environment

 Creating the Environment for The Confession of Pain

    For the 3D video, creating the environment became a complicated and important task. Because I do not have any experience in how to work with the 3D modeling programs as well how to effectively film the animation, I decided to collaborate with a game artist - Gabrielius Bubnelis. I deeply value his help with the programming as well as the creative input that he has generously shared.

When thinking about the environment, initially I envisioned the elderly model walking in an empty space. Only the striking red light was to be the element of the surroundings. After a few discussions with my collaborator, I understood that the environment in which the model is could play a very important part when generating a specific feeling for the audience. I suggested that to express the isolating feeling that chronic pain has evoked in me, the model should be in a corridor-like space. It is also because to me, the hallway is a metaphor for a never-ending journey that is narrow and concentrated only on one goal - healing in this context. I wanted the room to feel claustrophobic, as if there was no space to breathe, and look almost hospital-like, to generate a feeling of anxiety. After a few design suggestions and tryouts, Gabrielius created a few examples to choose and communicate which direction I would like to go.

Experimentation with the Environment

As seen in the examples above, we narrowed it down to two flooring and wallpaper designs. The first one, was the initial concrete, hospital-like, cold space, while the second one was an apartment-like room. I played the animation in both spaces and intuitively felt that the second space was the better option for it. The green walls and wood elements reminded me of the daily life in which I had to face chronic pain, contrary to the hospital environment where I did not spend as much time although the idea of pain is often deeply tied with the environment of a hospital. Again it is the concept of living with a condition that follows you outside of a medical building, it is not something that can quickly heal, it becomes part of your life. I felt that the space represented that.

After choosing the design, it was important to think of a layout. At first, I envisioned a linear, isolated, never-ending corridor. After some discussion with the collaborator, it appeared to me that making a labyrinth-like space could be a very exciting option as well. My experience with chronic pain was never linear, it had twists and turns. I heard many different opinions and diagnoses. The labyrinth of corridors resonated with that. It is still a claustrophobic space, yet it is even more disturbing as no matter which turns you take, there is another corridor with another turn. The space increased the sense of confusion that I wanted the audience to feel.

The Layout of the Environment